Thai Customary Greeting - The 'Wai'

The Thai greeting and show of respects is by pressing the palms together near the chest and bowing. As the guest of Thailand, you will be exposed to and receive respect by this customary greeting. However, many Thais will unwillingly accept a handshake from you because it is not second nature.

Throughout Thailand, the ‘wai’ which is a distinctive and graceful gesture is fundamental to the Thai etiquette. This etiquette is equivalent to the European kiss-on-the cheek-greeting but will definitely horrify the Thais especially if a man is doing this to a Thai female who is not your wife or girlfriend! Nevertheless, it is satisfactory if the Thai is familiar with the Western culture.

The ‘wai’ can be baffling at large gatherings or formal functions when you are being ‘wai-ed’, bowed and smiled a hundred times. On the brighter side is when you are being ‘wai-ed’ to by others, you begin to feel quite significant!

You would be considered impolite if you didn’t return or at least acknowledge the ‘wai’ which at times it is difficult to do when you are carrying a handful of shopping bags or in the midst of a meal. The least you can do is gruff or nod your head. The exception is monks and royalty do not need to return a ‘wai’.

The ‘wai’ besides being a greeting is also a show of respect. It is rather difficult to decide when you should ‘wai’ or when someone should ‘wai’ you. As a foreigner, it is the easiest to ‘wai’ to very important people as soon as possible. If someone has ‘wai-ed’ you first, they would have beaten you to it.

If you really want to know when to initiate a ‘wai’, it will depend on your relationship to the other person. The one with the higher social statues will be ‘wai-ed’ first. You only have seconds to scrutinize the person in front of you but it is best to refrain from ‘wai-ing’ first if you lack the confidence.

One simple indication is age. If that person is older than you, then you should ‘wai’ them first unless they are someone whom you employ or you are paying for their services, such as a housekeeper, waiters, tailors, vendors, shopkeepers, taxi drivers. It is not essential to ‘wai’ your peers and friends. The exception is when leaving a party or gathering you should ‘wai’ everyone, as this is the polite way to excuse yourself from the crowd. Occasionally, you may even notice drivers 'wai' at passing sacred monuments – taking their hands off the steering wheels!

Engage your ‘wai’ accordingly
- As a show of gratitude, you will ‘wai’ to your superior when receiving a gift or promotion. Engage your ‘wai’ before you reach to receive the gift.
- Hold a ‘wai’ during the entire Buddhist sermon

To add to the confusion, there are different kinds of ‘wais’ as described below
- The normal ‘wai’ is with your hands pressed together at about chest level, presenting a gentle bow with your body.
- The ‘wai’ to the superior is with the tips of your fingers at nose level, still bowing your body.
- To convey the most respect and gratitude, ‘wai’ with your fingertips at mouth level and present a deeper and longer bow.

The Thais performed ‘wai’ is always delicate and graceful. It may be embarrassing and comical when performed by a foreigner, but the effort will still be appreciated. The technique to perform the ‘wai’ may take a bit of time but eventually this delightful greeting will be second nature at its best.

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